He's getting better. i'm using GuitarHero to teach him how to finger me. My clit = the red tab.
what happened last night?
u kept telling him to fuck u optimus prime style
that explains why his roommate kept saying autobots roll out this morning as i left
about to try to wax my asshole... wish me luck
angela screamed across the room SHES A CHAMP when i told the pharmacist plan b doesnt make me throw up
This Girl Got Ghosted By Her BF Of 5 Years While On A Trip They Took For Her Birthday
I'm gonna have sex with a woman...help
we marched down beaver avenue with lit tiki torches humming the olympics opening song.
Ohh god. I'm so nervous. This is terrible. He just introduced me as "the best girlfriend of his life" and Jenny as his "sexual roomate"
It's amazing how many friends she makes simply by carrying that flask of whiskey everywhere she goes.
I pulled my bra out of my dress and handed it to my mom..at cocktail hour during the wedding.
People Are Applauding Chrissy Teigen For Getting Candid About Breast-Pumping
i had choclate birthday cake for breakfast and am currently flossing my teeth w a condom wrapper. at work. hot mess for 200 alex
Babies are disgusting. I held one once. Then I washed my hands and rinsed my mouth out with wine.
Girl, he can't tell you not to take a bump just because you work tomorrow. You're on a wedding diet, remember?
Dude, chad is laying across the room, violently, passionately, pornographicly eating something and I seriously think the 'some thing' is fighting back.
I slept with a Brazillian Man, That's why I'm Watching The World Cup
Tacos and sex are way better than any anti depressant pill ever was. I think I made a medical discovery here.
Randomize
