Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
I left my keys in the garlic bread freezer in Publix.
just walked by a lingerie store, the sign out front, "Specials for Father's Day", in no way is that just not wrong.
We got a party bus for the nite. I found out the hard way why stripper poles are meant for girls.
i just got cockblocked by a guy drinking wine straight out of the bottle with a straw...
All I saw was a beagle come across the screen and explain the theory of relativity to me and leave
He just found another high guy at wal-mart. There now friends. His friend is eating a cupcake
I still can't believe he turned down that threesome with us in central park. He must be really committed.
I'm so high that I'm intently watching my neighbor move his car back and forth in order to put his motorcycle in the garage, and getting irritated that it seems so complicated.
I mean it's a good blow job, but it's not worth the four hour round trip.
Have 7 min to kill while I wait for liquor store to open. Feels really awkward.
Thanksgiving day drinking ended up with me in a shopping cart screaming where are the bitches and condoms. I'd say it went well.
So it was all good until she started grabbing my beard and telling me to "roar little lion"
I am the murdurer of this scooby doo episode
It's cool bro. The video I have of you drunk trying to fix it with the sonic screwdriver was worth it.
Randomize