I'm pretty sure that he just gave me the ginger disease
I cant wait for the day that I tell my daughter I named her after my favorite porn star.
Nick had a break down & said to me "Everybody's mad at me, I'm the douchebag, Im the fucking douchebag that everyone hates, Do you wanna come home with this douchebag?!"
You're going home with him aren't you?
I'll see ya in the morning when I leave his house
third eye blind makes so much more sense now that i have a drug problem
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how opposed are you to picking me up at the bar at 11:00am?
This is your morning news. Today at 5 pm I will be going out of town until the 29th. If you would like some great sex before I leave, please contact me. The available packages are: a house call, an outdoor excursion, or a delivery style in-car quickie. available only while supplies last.
Well anything after a French guy would have been a disappointment. But I'm fairly certain he was just trying to masturbate into me.
But Alex is drunk in Philly and I told him to come see me so that's "first-love,-drunk,-high,-and-it's-a-snow-day-hook-up-with-an-ex" points. 69
library dates and plan B? He is looking like a great catch.
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I'm hiding in a cabinet. I'm going to stay here.
The plan was to get laid... Now the plan is to survive.
Omg that was my second thought of the morning.
First was that we had pop tarts.
I had a spiritual reading tonight and my dead grandmother called me a whore.
I was going to learn how to knit but I got high instead.
Ate a slug for 39 dollars
I wouldn't expect anything less from a PhD student
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