Also my back is semi rug burned and I'm holding you fully responsible.
I would love to give you more rug burn
It feels like he gave my taint an indian burn.
You get to witness red pubes. I'm almost jealous. That's like my dream.
Yeah, she tried to drown her but then they hooked up.
You defs just slept for 6 hours in a porta pottie. You should probably just kill yourself.
underwater hpnotiq shots? sure why not.
Why on earth is he slamming his body into the wall again?
I don't want a baby! I JUST WANT AN ORGASM THAT ISN'T SELF INFLICTED.
Hey, I'm probably about to be arrested but I didn't want to wake you. But it would be cool of you to get the $500.00 I have in the box I keep my "medicine" in and come bail me out. Also I figured you would be amused at the thought of me fending off brutal prison rape tonight.
Bro, if we got a house, it'd basically be a revolving door for slightly overweight, but extra cute, sexually deviant girls with daddy issues.
I was full on naked standing in his room and I just said "this isn't me" and left.
I'm the catering manager, it's not my job to stop 2 teenagers from fucking in the bathroom. I couldn't bring myself to stop that sort of young romance anyway, that's what I pay you people for
What could go wrong? i could have a mental breakdown with a bottle of champagne hand cuffed to a frat bro
There was pot, but there are no Doritos, no Funyons, no Oreos.
Send help.
Live it up bro, they're always so surprised to find out you use magnums, being such a tiny man and all. It's a good thing.
Randomize
