If Ritalin and Plan B had an illegitimate child it would smell like me.
I just walked by a ginger with a mullet. I repeat GINGER mullet. So help us God.
worms taste like bacon by the way.
I always wondered what they tasted like.
the chair was smiling at me in sociology and i had to try not to burst out laughing.
i took an adderall last night to write a paper. i ended up watching 7 hours of roseanne and couldn't look away
You were mumbling a lot and offered me 20 dollars to leave you alone
you're the only person I know who would bring a water bottle of screwdriver to a wedding, and toast with it during the speech
told our landlord the hole in the wall was from your head during drunk sex..
how did he take it?
not as well as i would have thought
I'm back here naked if anyones wondering
Your topless pictures make me question reality
only i would grind with someone to harp music at a gay wedding
I'd rather blow Nickelback than be told he gave me gonorrhea. I'd even post it on Facebook for all of the world to like, share, and judge me.
I've done dumber things than this for flimsier reasons. Come with. If I pull it off I need a witness, and if I fail I need an escape plan.
What do you mean not that crazy? I had sex last night. with my\nBOSS. in the restaurant where we WORK.... ON A DINNER TABLE.
We have such a parasitic relationship. But the kind where the parasite benefits from the relationship. Like the pilot fish and a shark. The fish gets the leftover food scraps from the shark and the shark gets a free bath from it.
that's so insightful.
Randomize
