There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.
Just saw cops pull over the ice cream truck. What a dick
I rubbed one out into an envelope and mailed it to her. Game point, I win.
i told her that i loved her pillow breasts and then she asked me if i wanted to motor boat them. so yea, i do need the room tonite.
There's still flour in my hair. And I don't even want to know what the neighbors think happened infront of my house.
I actually have to watch Breaking Bad to make me feel better about my choices last night.
Okay. This morning the comforter was wet, you were underwearless and using a tiny blanket. What'd you do??
I jammed my finger giving him a hand job. Don't ask how, I'm still trying to figure that out.
So, my love of dick may have landed me in a cult. On the bright side, I now have a discount at Spencer's.
He walked around my apt complex completely naked and started peeing in the maintenance because he thought it was the bathroom. So yeah, pretty drunk.
It's technically 2016 but since I haven't gone to bed I'm still counting it as 2015, so I'm gonna drink all the alcohol in my house so tomorrow I can become the better version of myself that I'll be for 5 minutes.
I'm going to preface tonight by saying that I'm sorry for tequila, shopping carts, and having to chase me.
We decorated the tree, drank wine, and he went down on me with Christmas music on in the background. Christmas IS coming.
Randomize
