grinding to god bless the USA? really?
shut up
i just thanked the atm machine for giving me cash
If I pass out leave the food near me so i can wake up to it
"Shots" has been nominated for a grammy. Now all of the US has sunken to our level...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just snuked. Sneezed and puked
John stretched a condom over his face and tried to puke in it.
We dropped so many bottles they would only give us plastic cups. We actually drank ourselves back to preschool.
He said i got a new job lets blow this money he bought 4 bottles at the club he is now crying after seeing the reciept
I have a big to do list for you. Number 1 - me. Number 2 - drink wine 3. Talk my ears off. 4. Me again
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I really dont wanna go to a traffic light party. I have nothing red to pretend I'm taken with. Without something red my "my girlfriend is away in the mines" story wont work.
I almost drank vegetable oil. Where were you? I needed you.
I just wrote the Drag Queen from Saturday Night on FB and apologized for licking her. Weirdest thing I have ever typed...
The Wolf of Wall Street “I ain’t fuckin’ leaving!” speech when the cops broke up your party though...
She's not answering my calls
Well it sounds like you really fucked up
WHO HOLDS A GRUDGE OVER MEMES
Everything is scary i hate being an adult i hate responsibility tell me a dick joke
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