if you are receiving this text, you are one of the people i hate
Did you read the article making fun of the right wing extremists? How they organized this 'tea party', and to propagate it they would mail teabags to their senators? And it became a verb...they had posters saying 'teabag obama!' yeah...
A message to Mrs Obama perhaps?
are you drunk enough to hook up with me yet?
I drove you home. there is no excuse for wrecking your car 3 hours later.
its not college until your roomate walks in on you having sex in his bed. twice
You threw a bunch of trashcans into the middle of the street and nothing happened. I fell on one car and suddenly there were cops everywhere...
No. I'm wrapped up in my sheets like a burrito. Carry me
I just found a piece of glass in my ear from Saturday.
That one dude should feel honored if he were to get herpes from you. Fuck that Guy. He is a herpe.
I just realized that at some point last night I told someone I would only be friends with 16% of them because the other 84% stole my people's land
I'm 25 and I shit my bed last night. And I'm telling you about it. Not sure which is worse
I was so ripped I had a natty light box over my head carrying a spray bottle out in the streets trying to give car washes.
My tongue is raw from licking all that salt with my tequila shots...happy cinco de mayo
I will be wearing a suit out more cuz it has been decided i rage harder with a power tie
You know, you could always move. Lol somewhere without gators, water moccasins, and Marco Rubio.
Randomize
