i want you to feel like i'm letting you into my heart, not just my vagina.
I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
its freezing days like this when i seriously consider littering to speed up the global warming processes.
there's got to be a less slutty way to tell him the baby isn't his
woke up with food on the counter from chipotle, taco bell, green cactus, and on the border take out. explain?
you were trying to get this Spanish chick to sleep with you. you were showing her how much you "loved her native food."
Oh please. You given/recieved a handjob out in public. I think that shy ship has sailed.
so im goin to clemson & my drug dealers goin to penn state. this is the hardest breakup EVER.
They had half off shots during the fourth quarter. I was powerless.
I was the only one at the party that didn't get their name taken by the police. I'm convinced that I'm the main character of Ferris Bueller's Drunken Adventures.
Still losing my voice, so I am trying to get it back through drugs. Welcome to my Monday logic.
I need a Jamo leash. Just tie it to my wrist and every time you see me reaching for a shot of it, just yank my hand away
I broke out the Krispy Kreme, and am possibly having random internet sex in less than an hour. I think I got this breakup under control.
I just wrote my resume on the same park bench I got felt up at in freshman year of highschool... I've truly come full circle
Never in my life have I seen a grown ass man get on all fours and attempt to buttfuck himself with the leg of a chair. I love Vegas!
Is it bad that if I found out I couldn't have kids I'd be more pissed that I've been using unnecessary condoms than the fact that I'll never be a mother?
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