Having a conversation over beer pong about a threesome I participated in...it's only Wednesday
everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
I thought he was joking about bailing you out until I saw the picture of you and the sheep in the morning paper. Were those my boots you had on it
She has a concussion we think. Dancing to barbie girl.
he sent me a picture of his dick with a heart border around it
I think I've lost the thrill of being a slut. It's just that the newness has worn off, I think.
she pulled the sheets over her head to blow me but the static kept making little lightning bolts and I was too high and got really scared she was going to electrocute me.
and being hungover still at 4 in the afternoon is NOT "having allergies"
I fell asleep to him stroking my ass calling it his precious.
I'm pregnant.
The fact that this number is not in my contacts is giving me hope it's a wrong number???
HE'S EATING THE CONFETTI. STOP HIM NOW.
Drunkenly, I gave him a molly instead of an aleve so A) I'm still looking for him and B) I'm not sure about his headache.
Another guy on Tinder just asked about "the hotter girl" in my pictures. I fucking hate being your friend.
I'm not well. Although it could be worse.
My cousin is so hungover she quit her job.
my friends roomated asked me this morning if we went to mcdonalds last night and i had no idea...that is until i checked my purse and found half a mcdouble in it...
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