So we walked by this chick's house and she starts yelling at her boyfriend "STOP HITTING ME WITH YOUR DICK"
Your sister got a Brazilian yesterday. It looks great
I wish I has some fucking Fairy God Parents, I want a kit kat so bad.
After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
Yeah I think we tried to use the shower curtain as a parachute because its tied to my backpack with some string. Dont know if anyone actually attempted it though.
and do you remember when you were dressing me if i had money in my bra?
come over, blizzard of oz party. dress up.
I'm staying in tonight, it's my Christmas present to my liver.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
Just made a beer run. At 9am. In my pjs. I should not be graduating today
Were you citizens arresting people again last night?
"Because this is an ongoing legal matter" is how his morning after sex text began. So...
He came into my room last night and started peeing underneath my desk, I told him the bathroom was the next door over.
Just cuz u chase vodka with sweet tea doesn't make it sweet tea vodka
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