Denial is the first step to alcoholism…and I don't hate it
Proposition. Sex. No words, no talking about it later. I just want you tonight.
they made me velveta mac and cheese and fish. I wanna stay here the rest of my life
Also, our mothers are placing bets on which of us will get pregnant first.
I've now graduated to the level of gay where I can tell Tegan and Sara apart.
Overdraft my account again. Parents are starting to ask questions. What would go over better a gambling or drug addiction??
I just learned a new drink. Sloppy Ninja. Half Saki Half Nyquil
The trees feel like magic. Come fly to taco bell with me.
I found my hair extensions. They were in my hamper.
I had lunch with him today and quietly mourned his wasted good looks on such a disappointing set of genitals.
she basically told me that her vine videos last longer that I do
If TJ is short for Trader Joe, I'm gonna fuck him
My nerves will need dicks later so.. I'll call you
He plays D&D and his dick should be carved out of marble. I think I'm in love.
How do you say "put it in me" in Spanish... I'm dealing with language barriers here.
Randomize
