thats the only time ive ever had sloppy firsts
And now that i don't feel so bad because you're not pregnant the $15 for the pregnancy test I bought would be appreciated
I think he may have overheard our "how much coke would you fuck me for" conversation last night...
I literally might walk of shame home on a cable car. If that doesn't scream San Francisco I don't know what does
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He was singing Justin Beiber while we did it. I love secure Spanish men
I made a Russian puke. I outdrank a Russian. I am unstoppable.
i showed up sober to class for the first time. my prof said that i was "off my game today". i love philosophy
rigging a system to keep my jello shots cold in class. important election day work.
He's sweet and rough. A wonderful contradiction. He's the starburst of sex.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All i hear is "BITCH BETTER HAVE MY HONEY" and i turn around and there is a dude in a bear costume. It was fur real.
Sometimes a girl needs 4 shots of whiskey in her diet coke at 5 in the afternoon and i feel no shame in admitting that girl is me
I cried over the lack of milkshakes I've consumed in the last month
He said he actually "met" me for the first time through a picture his housemate had of me, drunk and passed out in a pool of my own vomit, on the floor of his basement.
Care to explain the single rose and the package of "Cowboy Moustaches" I found on the porch?
I think the night went to shit after he started sweating and crying about a taco he dropped on the ground 3 years ago. No more blind dates
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