We traveled between two mile markers in 18 seconds. Do the math.
Brickbreaker makes my post drinking poops that much better. Sorry, I had to tell someone who might agree.
you know you made some mistakes when your last two boyfriends are both obsessed with women's curling...
Whoever decided putting Tom Seizmore and Heidi Fleiss together in rehab should win some kind of award.
I just want a better ending for myself. Not walking around with one sock on and my bush hanging out.
Ya know, sometimes when he kisses me in public I want to scream "HE DRIVES A PORSCHE!" so people watching understand that I don't have low standards, I'm just very materialistic.
I mean, I'm not looking for prince charming. I'm looking for the glass slipper of dicks.
I've never felt so inclined to grow a dick. THIS is what the gays in this town have done to me
im at work. we just had a random 14-year-old amish girl come in and gift us with cinnamon rolls as thanks for letting her use the bathroom. i dont even know.
I'm beginning to worry that I seem to get along best with people when I'm naked with them.
She kissed me, then said "mmm your face tastes like it needs my pussy on it."
Wanna have a sleepover and take me to court in the morning?
Dude. I need you to practice dancing around in your banana hamock. Party boy style. I'll call later with details.
I need a drink. No, several. I need several drinks. Drunk, I need to be drunk. Definitely need to be drunk
I know it sounds cheesy, but i think both me and her mum know they are "thanks for being so cool about finding nudes of your daughter on the camera" flowers
Randomize
