This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
what are u so afraid of ive smelled ur poop before
i'm sorry for cheering you on when you were making out with him. i was just celebrating the fact he was decent looking for once
I've decided the third guy that I slept with is who I lost my virginity to...
I was informed last night that im not allowed to pick up the bouncers and carry them around anymore. Last sat is starting to make more sense
im taking a nap outside. wake me up in an hour.
way to go to work and not wake me up. when you get home youre rubbing me with aloe and giving me a blowjob. no excuses
You know how girls with huge tits have back problems? Do you get knee problems or something?
She said we "made love." I had to explain to her that when both parties agree that the first time time they have sex both people agree to video tape the whole thing its not "making love" but more like random good time fun sex.
Oh boy. Send him a care package with laxative cookies and alcohol. So he can shit himself while he's passed out drunk.
Gay bathhouses. They're actually a thing. So god does exist. And he doesn't hate me as much as you think he does
My stripper pole led lights flash with the sound so it's awsome with music
your phone died, so you started bawling in the bar
yeah that sounds like me
HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT
So I just ran in to the Couger you saw me take home last month who i haven't talked to since then at Wawa and she was PISSED.. APPARENTLY i fucked her niece last week
She did what?
Who. The correct term is she did who.
Did you see him? The correct term is definitely what.
Would an open wound count as good sex or bad sex?
Randomize
