ready 4 sex 2nite?
wow. woo me matt, woo me.
It saddens me that girls will never know the wonder feeling of pulling your sweaty nutsack off of your leg.
a woman just threw her tv out the window while screaming "will you fucking work now?". i'm never moving
I slept with some guy because he drew a dinosaur on my arm
He waited til after we had sex to tell me he had herpes... Ugh I hate being drunk
I shouldn't trust a guy I just met with the pull out method. That's a big responsibility.
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
He told me to be careful with the shrooms because he mostly had caps left. He sounded apologetic but that's the best news all week.
I'm like a freaking volcano of life and sexual frustrations
I came home braless and wearing a tail....
She said her name is "Goose" and regardless of her being a lesbian, sometimes she just "needs a good dick"
I wore his All-American medal during sex. I came in first that night.
He couldn't undo my bra. He ended up breaking the clasp he clawed at it so long. We met on Tinder for God sake
I'd date him. I'd date the fucking shit out of him.
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
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