What do you want? Don't say anything that would make me look like a pussy at the store.
I am only moving my arms so I remember that I can. These brownies are wild.
Dont worry about the blood on the pillow. its from my face.
Just had the weirdest flashback. Did we buy melon, take it into the restaurant and try to make them give it to us as dessert?
we've called him dos banos ever since he threw up in 2 separate bathrooms with the same puke
I find it worrying that she bit me in bed. Then proceeded to write her name in bite marks. All without ever losing the rhythm of our fucking.
I know how I'm going to make my fortune.. designing an icepack made specifically for the vagina.
Well the weed wore off around 10:30 and then the date dragged on until about 1 in the morning. So I've decided I really need to start smoking closer to the actual start time of a date. Then maybe they'd be more bearable.
What would you do if your asshole suddenly made the sound of a sheep duck baa/quacking the words kill me
You are so incredibly one of a kind, it's astounding
I can not be a lesbian living on Beaverland.
was I atleast graceful when I feel down that flight of stairs and broke my hand?
Was just at a stoplight and some kid was smoking a blunt and we smiled at him and he offered to pass it between cars... Only in Rockford
I just saw a chick driving drinking a juice box smoking all while on the phone that is talent
I visited the library for the first time in my college career tonight and I got laid. I think I'm gonna come back...
She shouldn’t care what consenting adults do behind closed doors
You do realize it was her husband you were hooking up with behind that door, right?
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