is your mom at the bar?
Dude, TWO hot chicks on jeopardy tonight. gonna be a good one
Dude, I am so turned on right now. Hot chick with glasses from brooklyn is absolutely crushing right now, taking whole categories. might beat off to jeapordy...
do another line during during the commercial and make the magic happen during double jeopardy.
So when we opened his headboard we found a bottle of crisco sitting on top of his porn magazines.
I guess we all know what he was cookin.
im so glad i don't have to work tomorrow. I'm spendin all night on the new call of duty.
Wow. That's the gayest thing you ever said.
Look man i'm staying in playing videogames and growing a beard. Its not like i'm trying to get a girlfriend.
my grandma just put on bowling shoes, to play wii bowling.
I seriously think I have a tan line on my stomach from getting a boner while in the taning bed.
It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others..
I'm reciting my presentation (beer in hand) on the porch to a snowmen audience.
French people screaming and throwing stuff out the window. We told the manager and he's pissed and going up there. This is gonna be like cops. Maybe better than cops.
Definitely want to eloquently cunt punt those bitches thru the field goals of life.
You put me in such a good mood with that road head, I bought everyone at Hooters donuts.
I know but at least you've never been asked to have sex dressed up like Catwoman
What guy invites over a booty call, gets all naked and then when the real fun begins and a condom is needed, claims to not have one? And wears socks THE entire time?
I stole us four large rolls of toilet paper from the hotel carts. I feel like the breadwinner in this relationship
she bought my drinks all night, made me breakfast in the morning, and let me use her expensive hair products before i left. best one night stand ever.
Randomize
