it's so much work when my dad takes my car to get fixed, i had to take out the bottles, condoms, and my pipe
24 hours later and my vagina is still tingling. That good.
I'm okay.. I had a good heart to heart with the cab driver Raheem - it's going to be our year.
Yea my vagina was pretty pissed at me for not taking advantage of the situation...
You need to come over. I cant get her to stop eating honey mustard straight from the squeeze bottle
Took 45 minutes to masturbate. Fuck you Zoloft. I'm never gonna be diagnosed with depression again
Or I could just give you a blow job and make it up to you.
No, that's okay. Don't worry about it.
Going once.....twice.........sold to the girl who didn't really wanna do it anyway.
So Monday we're lesbians.
Deal. This decision is final and any rebates on this will result in losing an eyeball.
And your cousins porn shouldn't have been the first straight porn you watched. And for that I am sorry
No later than 4:00 ok - I'm tying my viagra high into a superbowl halftime showstopper. Ya, you might wanna look away for that
At least I got to make out with you a little before you proposed.
I fell into a manhole last night, so there's that
Get off the floor, put away the cookie dough, get ur shit together Scott.
She walked into the kitchen, said 'we've come to this time of the party,' reached into the bowl of cold spaghetti and shoved a handful in her mouth.
Want to meet at a cool spot and just park like cops side-by-side and you can eat some potatoes and I can smoke a cigarette in your face?
Randomize
