What was that guy's name that you dated that wore the leotard?
I just farted so loud that my cat got so scared he fell off the couch.
u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
i used the phrase horny rhinos in my paper. i hope my teacher appreciates the size of my balls
I'm going to skip that pointless convo with Mark, stick with the "we're talking" status, and bone barely legal, borderline gay, preppy guys on the DL.
and he said i stripped him down, hand cuffed him to his bed post, and tickled his arm pits, and then continued to watch The Hangover.
i just saw the eighteen different ways i could die and only after that did i realize i'd made a poor decision
Once he past out I measured his penis with my remote.
Won't anyone wonder why I'm mute, bald, and wearing an eye patch?
I know it's not technically the "Mile High Club" but we def need a name for the airport bathroom. Cuz that just happened.
you know it's a good party when the fucking floor caves in. THE FUCKING FLOOR.
HIS NAME IN MY PHONE IS JOSHUA DREAMCHASER I CAN NOT
NO SHAME NOVEMBER
Well my parents know I get medical Cannabis they saw me on the news at the dispensary
This is why people in Buffalo die of heart attacks. This and wings
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
Randomize
