Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
He was so confused why there was a string hanging out of my vagina.
all we ever talk about is how much i like your dick or my drug problem.
He's been dead since March and more people write on his wall than mine.
I gave her a mint afterward. It felt like giving turndown service at Hotel BJ.
You know your in college when you use the receipt from the liquor store as a bookmark
So after I pop out this baby we need to just go on a monthlong coke binge so I can get skinny again before vegas
Well I checked the bush outside his apartment building this morning, and he wasn't there... So I knew he was home.
He says I vaguely mumbled happy New year, kissed him, threw up and then went back to sleep.
I made him dress me after we fucked. He put me in TMNT pants and then told me I looked hot.
My friend asked me if I got home okay and I replied "Glad teat. Goodnight." Usually I can translate drunk me, but I'm even lost on that one.
Also I'd apologize for texting you flipping my shit about the science of hair growth while I was shrooming last night but we know each other better than that
They are like untrained puppies reaking havoc on a newly furnished house. Out of control.
You just compared our vaginas to a newly furnished house...I can dig it.
If you wanna do actual business call my office. If you’re just looking to get laid you need to up your game
Randomize