I just saw a girl make a shank with the underwire in her bra...
Spotted at kelly concert- 10 year old in a homemade "I do not hook up" t shirt. Well I should certainly hope not, sweetheart.
You held your own hair and threw up into a red cup...I think they were more amazed than upset.
I am so 35 right now. Listening to REM, drinking red wine, and crying over an article about ecstasy in oprah magazine.
I need a gatorade, my back cracked, my crimper, my shot glass, a sock of rice and an explanation.
You did this to yourself.
I have no words
Neither did my mom, when she walked in on me squating with my balls in a cup of hot water.
Apparently from about 3-5AM I was consoling that crying stripper about her life choices.
google maps should a have a setting for this. like I AM ABANDONING EVERYTHING TO MEET A GIRL WHO IS 10 HOURS OF MILES AWAY. HOW DO WE DO THIS OPTIMALLY?
Someone came into our hotel room and took our remote
What should I do?
he told me he had a dream that he laid his head in my lap and silently gazed up at me. WHY AM I ALWAYS THE DUDE IN RELATIONSHIPS
His dad and I had a drunk conversation about life. At 4 am he told me that I was 21 and cute and should fuck whoever I want.
Yes. I am out of condoms. I kept filling them with glow paint and playing with them when I was on mushrooms, which resulted in me having unprotected sex last weekend
She thinks you guys are the gods of the bathroom. If she runs past you naked, give me a heads up
long story short, the bouquet was used as a sacrificial torch
First aid class means get dry humped by moderately attractive college students during heimlich maneuver training.
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