i'm sure her mom would have loved to find out her daughter has herpes via facebook
I just wanted to let you know that if you dont tell me to stop texting i will still keep on trying, you matter to me
restraining order is on its way, crazy bitch
There's a show on bravo about fat people dancing. FAT PEOPLE. DANCING.
This is god's gift to the unemployed.
For using a life jacket as a pillow, I slept pretty good last night...
Why do I have peacock feathers super glued to my body?
I just tripped out to the Angel of Music from Phantom of the Opera in my car. Wayyyy to high for shuffle right now.
Every time I stand up, gravity punches me in the tits. This is horrible.
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
Oh god. I asked to "play his sexaphone" which I though was a super sex way to say "let me blow you". He fucking walked home at 4:30am
Please come home, i don't want to feel like basket garbage girl but I'm in your alleyway and not sure how to change that.
I need to quit being a slut. It's to the point that I got my period today and automatically I Believe I Can Fly popped into my head.
Currently putting together my outfit for this weekend, AKA a poster board that says "I'll cook you breakfast and do all your laundry, take me home." On front and back
I woke up in my tom cruise outfit with my house key tied to my thong....
Woohoo! Instead of a pregnancy test you can buy me a burrito
Why is "Oprah of drinks" written on my arms?
You said to write it on you, after you kept saying, "You get a drink, you get a drink, everyone gets a drink."
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