Theres a random in my bed. Omg but at least he's a law student?
i just uploaded pictures of my nephew, and you & d puking in the same toilet. i think i should keep them in the same album. show my nephew what he has to look forward to.
Found out why they call her Halfpipe Jenny-NOT the cool reason we thought
Ok so I could say "im sorry"...but instead ill just say "unsupervised...jager...military guys...green school bus called the juice box...and HUGE dick"
In honor of the internet blackout, I think everyone needs to change their Facebook pictures to ones of them being blacked out.
A houseboat for a bachelor party is a terrible idea, we nearly die when on dry land, so how the hell are we supposed to survive a 3 day binge on a massive lake?
I want someone to sweep me off my feet and you want someone to fuck you on the kitchen table. They're both perfectly logical needs.
Secondly, that waffle is lost for good. I have no fucking idea where that bitch is
When you glanced over and and mouthed "I'll take the fat chick" I knew it was going to be an epic Sunday night.
We might as well just set our livers out to sea on burning ships
Just for once I'd like my first interaction with a new GP to not be an obvious sex injury.
We found you in the bathroom at 1AM throwing money into the toilet making wishes. That drunk.
.... Seriously?
wyd
Laying here debating on if i want a sandwich or an orgasm.
they gave me money. the money smells like weed. also they gave me weed
Did u puke in a church parking lot? And go to the wrong funeral yesterday? Lol
Randomize
