she claims you yelled BOMBS AWAY when you came. tell me she's lying
but she didn't tell you i squeezed, built up pressure, and napalmed her face as i yelled it, did she
I think I'm going to inject the gummy vitamins with vodka
I'm glad you're using your medical degree for some good for once
She says I'm cute and I remind her of her brother. She's too hot to back out now. I don't know. I'm guna go for it.
He just came into the room wearing nothing but a Speed Racer helmet. I think he just invented a fetish.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When they say "all expenses paid" does that include bail?
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
I am self-sufficient. I puked in a wine glass and emptied it in the trash. Points for style and neatness
I woke up and he was just feeling up my stomach. I felt like buddha and he was rubbing my belly for good luck. never again.
After sex he just told me I'm definitely pregnant and it's a girl. Should I run?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just walked by the barren window naked in a family neighborhood. Who needs dignity.
she used her teeth again, but this time it was out of love
And on a positive note i found a list that i made in 3rd grade titled "what to do if you want a guy to like you"
i think we sleep fucked last night...
am drunk, naked, and blow drying cat. need adult supervision
Bro, I was just laying in bed with this girl and her boyfriend came an woke me up
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