..Thats also how I think I got the lyrics from MIAs Paper Planes Sharpeed on my ass? Maybe.
Get condoms and clear your schedule for the night. I'm bringing chinese food!
I swallowed your vile semen and you don't know what color my fucking eyes are!?
so I woke up this morning and on their fridge, the first item on the shopping list was my virginity.
woke up to an unread text message i sent to myself: "brreakfdast..pork and ice cream."
I called him daddy. To his face. Somewhat sober. What more could I do?
You can drink as much as you want but it's not gunna make her forehead any smaller
I was hoping it might at least fix her teeth
How do we turn this unicorn pinata into a bong?
He pulled a condom out of his satchel and i questioned my entire life.
Before he comes over remember the house standards. Ask yourself "will he stalk my sister or myself in the future?". If the answer is yes, then no, he isn't allowed.
"willing to pay anyone fun whos willing to hang out and laugh at my jokes while my friends are MIA" is this to desperate?
He just texted me saying "you've got a face that suggests you give really good head". Is this a compliment? Do I say thanks?
the straight edge chick smoked with me, because according to her my bowl is pretty
so you 69ed him in the parking lot of your apartment
yah I won't allow him in my apartment
I jerked off 12 hours ago exactly. I owe it to my penis to get laid.
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