We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
So I pulled my t-shirt down, pushed my boobs up and marched right into that church!
he's a bartender at a gay strip club. maybe he can work his magic. with getting u in, not gay magic.
I'm not sure if what i'm hearing downstairs is sex or not, but if it is, it sounds like there's a dog involved...i'm mildly concerned.
Yea.. I remember nothing. Except that the taxi driver was 56 years old and apparently never cheated on his wife.
he's only going to be home for two days, his dick is going to be in me for the whole 48 hours, he doesnt have a choice.
we've been together for three years, and i still get excited when i know i'm going to give him a blow job. it's that kind of love
I wouldn't blame my organs if they just decided to quit working after this weekend
It is unclear if my flaming esophagus is hangover induced.
The bald guy bought me a shot so I chugged it and then walked out to the middle of the dance floor and told an old woman that might be your moms twin to bend it over...We didn't end on a good note though. Dude she stepped on my vans.
I drank beer out of some sort of animal horn all night, then we fucked to a "viking metal" album. I feel like I should go pillage something to complete the Norse trifecta.
He tried to buy me a drink at dollar beer night. All 3 of his credit cards were declined, so he asked me if I could cover it. Needless to say, I'm not calling him back.
just used my $120 dollar stats book for the first time to kill an ant... good thing i stole it
it was weird i started the party in just my underwear and woke up in my clothes
Let's just face it you're going to have an arrangement with your future wife your fuck me on Thursdays
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