paul mccartney is starting to look like angela lansbury
Sorry I couldn't answer your call, I'm expecting a call from Chris Hansen.
I'm guessing you didn't end up going to the bar last night.
Nope. Ended up at what I believe was a slumber party down the street.
finally cleaned my dorm for the first time all year. bleach is awesome.
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
he's totally gay but hes wondering what hes missing out on. Im going to show him.
no pressure.
i feel as uncomfortable as your camel toe looks.
he came in the shower with me...i thought it was going to be nice and romantic...until he started peeing on my leg.
We should reintroduce naked Mondays
Do you think that we can get a group discount on liver transplants? We'll be like kids again!
I think he offered to cook me dinner or cook me for dinner. Not really sure. Just smiled and nodded.
thanks for the 52 voicemails of you and crystal reciting the pleg of allegance
So apparently I threw a potted plant at a clown last night and told him to get his life together.
Dougie got over his pride nerves. Found him dancing on a float wearing nothing but rainbow boxers.
I don't know how Dave is alive, I feel like he's been drinking since I met him.
but real talk, he made 1 phone call last night and had someone bring us tacos at 3am so idk I might be inlove
Randomize
