where am i from again
Seriously just heard: "we need some good ass wine. how bout this swa-vig-non blank"
hahahaha. Oh virginia: where the south begins
i want to get drunk and sing the national anthem on your roof again please.
I woke up in a place I've never been before, with people I've never met before using me as a table for domino's.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nope. If I'm going to drive an hour to fuck a teacher, it will NOT be missionary thats for damn sure.
There's a bag in my room with garbage, a thong, fritos, and an electrical cord. I'm assuming it's yours
........yyyyyyeah that's me
So I got lost trying to find you guys and ended up proposing to a bride in a bachelorette party with a condom.
I'm really hot. went tanning and this cheeseburger shirt like isn't breathable
I just found a piece of squished oatmeal cream pie in my armpit. So very sad.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So do I get to ride the beginning of the November stache or what?
I just quoted part of the Pokemon theme song in a sext... And it worked
i survived drinking for 24 hours, an 8 ball of cocaine and a threesome. I think you can handle moving.
Smargarita sloshedurday tomorrow around 2
Bring a helmet for your liver
You said you're gonna end your night with a six pack and awful erotica
I'm too horny to sleep. I need some violent sex to wind me down.
Randomize