Brogan sounds similar to Bridget...sorta.
Every girl's name is automatically translated to "Baby/Milk Carrier" in my brai
it was funny though when you first woke up you pointed at my shoe and said i need my jacket and then put my shoe on your hand
dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
how are you gonna miss the world cup? other than the olympics it's our last way to assert our dominance over China after this economic bull shit
He kept moaning America instead of Erica while fucking me.
Walking down the street at 11 pm dressed in bubble wrap. Why is the bar so fucking far away??
I am not ready to suck todays dick. Todays dick just laughed and came on my face.
i ordered a pipe on amazon, and under recommended items, it gave me a top hat. it knows me better than my parents.
I left my bra and a book at his place. He's a hot Scandinavian who is into physics and computers - had to step up my game.
Plan B, arranged marriage to a rich Indian, is rapidly becoming Plan A. Fuck Finals.
That would be an interesting position... Not entirely certain how that'd work!
Gravity is no match for my libido
I think the pizza delivery guy is getting a handjob next door.
God bless the petty bitch who invented screen shot
This bitch goes out driving during the nor'easter to get her ass eaten.. that’s dedication
He ate me out in the warehouse on a pallet of sunlight soap. I fucking love night shift!
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