I don't make mistakes...just understandable bad choices.
Masterbating to gospel music is like god cheering on your orgasm
im trying not to drink and cry in the same night anymore. i'll let you know how it goes
the fda needs to get their shit together cause these four loko going away parties are gonna kill me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Next year we will be 30 and no more shots during the week.
Good news. Isn't krabs. Bad news. Not sure what it is. Worse news. Encouraged not to fuck till known. Great news getting laid tonight
ARE YOU GOING TO SACRIFICE YOUR LIFE FOR MCDONALDS HASHRBOWNS
I'd rather just be alone, than deal with this bullshit. I just want to be alone. Cats and vibrators never let you down.
i woke up this morning and saw her in my bed and i said to myself, I think I might have a drinking problem.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The waitress at the airport bar just asked me if I wanted a "to go" beer, hahahahaha OF COURSE I WANT A TO GO BEER.
Next time I try to break into the police station drunk, please stop me.
Out of all the things you could eat off of my tits you choose lettuce? Thats so healthy. Yuck.
I should stop using "Braveheart would do it" as a basis for decision making...
I am witnessing a blind guy whip ass at beer pong
There is no way entering a gas station bathroom memorializing an alien abduction in rural New Hampshire is a good idea.
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