Do you realize we just stole 12 dollars worth of quarters each from the office petty cash just to get manicures? New high or New Low?
Oh, don't even get me started. Harry Potter is so pure. Twilight is just teenage girl porn.
after a month anything with tits is on the radar
Wow anytime a scalper has i need tix written on the back of a franzia box thats a trusted seller
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
You puked in the drive thru of Taco Bell. You puked as it was being handed to me. You managed to yell out "FIRE SAUCE" in between hurls.
Petty good. I just stapled a 5 dollar bill onto the chest of a sword swallower.
Reading an example in the GRE study book referencing Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles while wearing TMNT pajamas. *airfist*
omg please tell me you're eating pizza right now too.
I'm so incredibly high right now the fact I am texting is nothing short of miraculous. Call the Pope. Hell make me Saint Roy, patron of stoners.
At least is you came to Milwaukee to visit me you'd get the best mind blowing sex of your life and free wifi. Who doesn't want free wifi!
I love that there are toys on the counter. Coffee, tea, wine bottles, gag ball, and handcuffs.
My kitchen gets me.
Just got a Lifeproof case for Christmas so hold on and tell me how my shower nudes look
You're right, I'd say my real all time low was when I let that fifteen-year-old feel my boob.
ALL I WANT FOR CHRISTMAS IS FOR YOU TO SHUT THE FUCK UP FOR ONCE
dude, shes trippin so bad. idk what shes on, she just told me she doesnt remember her name then proceeded to get in the shower clothed to try to "rinse off the high"
Randomize
