Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
everyday i am more and more thankful i can still check the no box for "have you ever been convicted of a felony?" on applications
I just walked past a woman in the bar stroking a mans crotch, yelling 'I made this. I made this happen.'
You may have graduated college on time, but my 6th year ass gets to see awesome tits every day just for showing up.
The cops said we could pay $250 or spend the night in jail and get 2 free meals. I might pee in mail-boxes more often
he may be homeless but his dick however is not... anymore.
No...this little piggys going to the bar
He was just lying on my lap in the backseat screaming how if the cops came he was a blanket.
I feel like i'm walking on a never-ending field of baby sheep.
My philosophy professor just told the class that he is suspicious of dolphins. The stoner in front of me totally gets it. I need to start getting high for this class.
By the way, do you realize that you asked me how much you could get for your eggs last night. And once you learned the price said that you had plenty to share.
Roommate is hosting a 'sorority retreat' at our house. If you need to get laid, stumble on over.
Well according to all the calls, texts, and Facebook messages, I threw up on you guys last night.
right after that u started calling me g-force and started trying to bellyslide down his drive way
Randomize
