I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
I wish I had more reasons to start sentences with the phrase, "Here's the thing you've got to remember about cougars ...
life lesson# 3: saying thank you on a subway really means "im not a native new yorker, so please feel free to touch my ass"
hmm. interesting. explain how you came across this knowledge.
i sneezed. he said bless you. i said thank you. he groped. i again said thank you.
I just woke up with the words DO IT on my hand and six beers in my purse.
kerrys trying to convince everyone in the bar shes a lesbian. cheers to not being the drunkest girl in the room. i probably wont piss myself tonight.
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
why the fuck would he compare you to sexy aquatic creatures?
How many weeks is it acceptable until I can start bringing freshman back?
I used his computer to order the pizza and the only thing he had in his search bar was 'text NASA'
That's exactly how my pussy feels when I shave it. Like a cross between a naked mole rat and a newborn child. Embrace it.
You know you're doing well in life when weed is considered to improve your job performance
He literally just peed in a trash can in our room. It didn't even have a bag in it
And then the night went full on bisexual.
feeding cats lunchmeat on my kitchen floor. come pour me another shot.
Looks like the opera singer hook up is paying off. Ran into the MILF from 407 and she said “your lady friend sounded like a very lucky girl.”
Randomize
