I just had to pull over at a starbucks to throw up in the bathroom. They really should not have let me be a lawyer.
I swear it started with good intentions but then my slutty side took over and we started playing strip checkers
No i'm not calming down the girl at white castle did not need to see the picture of my dick on your phone.
Duuuude - Drag Queen Bingo wasn't supposed to end like thissss
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was just told that i'm a premature cuddler. . . What does that even mean?
Whatever it is you failed
"guaranteed dick" "anywhere - her room, my room, trees, couch"
Sorry that was quotes about you from the grad student.
I'd love to sympathize with you but I'm drunk in a mansion
I cooked you Mac and cheese when I was drunk and drugged. That counts for about 4 meals. Try harder
Every time I think about it I can feel His toe in my mouth and I gag, I'm scarred for life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No...this little piggys going to the bar
I'll always remember you bringing me that pregnancy test in the middle of an ice storm. Best friend ever.
haha all our friends are at the carnival and I'm on stage dry humping a 40 year old
We are making a pool on how long he stays sober this time you want in?
There is a video of you making out with him, flipping off the camera, and holding the plastic flamigo that you had just stolen out of a yard
I haven’t been this excited since I found out they sold cases of Jack Daniels.
Randomize