What's the politest way to tell someone that you're only interested in them when they're naked, and even then it's just like a passing "meh?"
I should be sponsored by Trojan
We should write a comic book about the many adventures of your vagina. Maybe even give it a cape or something.
You asked the officer if he could bring you to the same jail as T.I.
Some dude at the gas station right now is buying a 30 rack of beast and a can of cat food. Happy Thanksgiving.
You went to church with your boobs hanging out?
Theyr'e a gift from god, I figured I should show him i'm using them well.
i just sold back the books i vomitted on
You just begged me to mute the porn and watch her ass bounce while listening to dubstep the whole time.
I already wrote the apology to my liver. He knows whats up
yea, there's something about a stripper whipping you with your own belt that makes you think
He passed out naked in my bathroom, then took a shower, then passed out again and then took another shower. Last time I let my brother visit.
I'm going to smoke the pathetic stems and miscellaneous particles that weren't good enough for all my other bowls because its all I have left. This is my bag's Rudy moment.
No it was fine, I've just never seen that many people eat dog food
I fear our relationship is coming to an end. Last night I felt the need to bloody apologise for waking him up with a blow job.
I want to meet people. Preferably ones with penises
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