you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
I just typed my entire senior project presentation on my blackberry,
Apparently we had sex last night, and then I made him drive me to the beach so I could puke in the ocean.
maddie and i have invented a community puke bowl. explanation later
He got drunk and insisted on licking my eyeball and called it a test of my trust in him.
There was a fucking SNAKE in the urinal. WHAT THE FUCK
Fuck. The basement bathroom I've been getting head in for 6 months just went 'Out of Service'.
Chapter 6 - how to lose your underwear in chicago
At my wifes high school reunion. Found out her nickname was 'Back Door Brooke'. EVERYONE is calling her that.
This is your liver's 7:15 wake up call. Mandatory margarita popsicles after work today. Rule #71: no excuses, play like a champ!
She told me she loves her boyfreind while she was giving me head. He must be a nice guy
I woke up in a poorly constructed blanket fort on a strange office floor covered in rug burns and champagne. How was your night?
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
I haven't even lived here for 24 hours yet, and I've already banged someone. My new hoe life is off to a great start.
I'm too depressed to drink my wine. That is what I would call a serious problem
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