it sounded like he was fisting a can of crisco.
I either just heard my neighbors having sex or she really agreed with whatever he was talking about.
ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
you went around the entire night in your french maid costume dusting off the "cob webs" on everyone's crotch saying "you havent gotten any action in a while"
I was wondering why i got so many friend requests the next day...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
sorry
why?
oh you didn't look in the living room yet, did you?
Are you wearing clothes?
Fuck no, who do you think I am
I had wine for breakfast at 6am, that's how visiting my parents went.
i woke up this morning put my hand under the pillow and there was a banana there
Please don't throw the wedding bouquet at me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just made the most “single life” Amazon order ever: protein bars and condoms.
The air tonight was full of shame when we saw each other.
Well if u wouldn't have had sex on the front porch last night I think that could have been avoided.
no i'm going to the dr today, he fucking banshee-shrieked in my ear as he was coming and now i can't hear out of it
On another note, I think my upstair neighbor is having sex. How awkward would it be if I showed up to her door with a bag of Chipotle?
just saw a girl run into an automatic sliding door, back up and try again
Would you say that skipping class and sitting alone in my room singing One Direction to myself and sobbing is an acceptable way to deal with the break-up
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