I hope my future cuntsucker is that tight
he is not the type of person you only have sex with once. god adds years to your life every time you sleep with him.
you started crying because you didn't get to wear your rainboots this week so i turned on the shower and let you jump around in it
youre the best friend ever
And it looks like I sent you 4 failed attempts at the word "hey." Sorry about that.
If you wake up soonish don't worry. I took your dog to burger king and now we're going to see some nice girls.
I have stripper ass cheeks all over my glasses
Legitimate concern. Who am I going to have birthday sex with?
I just saw a guy in a sombrero and holding an inflated blow-up doll in all her "glory" get escorted out of the mall. I hate Marley.
OH MY GOD I JUST WANT TO GO HOME AND FART ALL NIGHT.
probably one of the worst weekends ever... i got peed on by his sleepwalking roommate.
I couldn't tell if they ere dancing or fucking but they won the costume contest
THERE IS A VIDEO OF DMX SINGING RUDOLPH THE RED NOSE REINDEER
I'm officially in the Christmas spirit
Also we had sex while listening to fleetwood Mac on vinyl. Like the 70s called and told me to fuck off
just creeped your profile pictures and you should feel satisfied in knowing that you had great eyebrows even before people started drawing them on
Is it weird that my mother is taking body shots off my gf after meeting once?
Randomize