I'm waiting for seagulls to eat this throw up
why im i the only drunk person in the library?
You left half a beer on someones car and claimed it was a second day of hanakuh gift
Slugs feel like vagina... thought you would want to know
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
My vagina has become a graveyard for my brother's friendships...
he proceeded to grab my vagina through my leggings in the middle of the dance floor. strangely enough I was okay with it
Tell Taylor to rock on. Tell her she is so beautiful that the sun shines down on her face and shows her beauty. Tell her to live on, like Martin Luther King. He'll never die. He's living his dreams.
you know it's a good party when the fucking floor caves in. THE FUCKING FLOOR.
My dog is now used to me drunk singing and sleeps through it. I don't know how I feel about this
She was dressed as a banana and told me that I needed more potassium in my diet. Of course I went down on her.
And I wasn't CONVICTED of a felony, I just committed one
Omg this place. I'm at a neighborhood party. My mom has kissed two other moms. Where am I
I can still taste your cum in my mouth and my in-laws are coming over. This should go well.
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
Randomize
