Guy having heart attack in McDonalds. Classic.
How long is it safe to eat only Hot Pockets and Popsicles?
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
It was as if you forgot how to speak normally. All of your words came out either backwards or in song form
I can already almost taste penis in my mouth
People were drinking out of 26ers with straws, and somewhere someone yelled "fill me with dicks!" I'm home.
You are so predictable. I am willing to bet 20$ that instead of going out you are sitting on your couch, stoned, watching Seinfield re-runs and eating cheezits.
1. they're goldfish. 2 fuck you
Planning a foam party. Swimsuits are mandatory, and please no granny suits. If you wear a granny suit I will stick you in the corner and put a cone hat on your head.
The funny part was that the cop pulled us over cause the park was closed, not because I had just come up from giving the guy a blowjob when the cop drove by.
Where were you last night, and why am I not surprised that drag queens were involved?
Say whatever you bloody well like; you don't know the true meaning of life until you have smoked to a Sade cd.
HE WAS SUPPOSED TO BE THE TROPHY HUSBAND! I WAS GOING TO BE THE SUCCESSFUL ONE!
Its okay I found my bra. ...it was on your cat. I wont ask questions.
I don't have a cat..?
I came twice AND he sent me home with edibles. I think he’s a keeper.
I'm really busy with my period
Randomize
