Vibrating panties would be amazing during this conversation!
i now have a sippy cup solely for the purpose of drinking alcohol out of...am i an alcoholic?
You're earring is so big in my mouth
I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
Let's make a pact to never get in a cab at 3am together unless it's to go home or for pizza.
Fine then. I'll just do all this coke on my own this weekend and die. It'll be strictly your fault.
His kisses tasted like beef jerky and captain morgan. I'm pretty sure I came before he even took my clothes off.
I made him breakfast and we cuddled on the couch watching march of the penguins, which is, in case you were unaware, the opposite of fucking on a pool table
I have a pocket in my purse that is just for condoms and cocktail swords. I feel like that speaks volumes about me as a person
In other news, someone I've had sex with won jeopardy last night.
Getting drunk and throwing things at people isnt the same with you not here. Remember when you dislocated my elbow and then popped it back in in one motion?
candyland with pharmaceuticals ... what could go wrong
You need to finger her with the Spock hand sign since she loves Star Trek.
At one point I had two blunts in my hand and had no idea where they came from.
Your vagina must be outstanding or have a secret entrance to Narnia if someone is will to fly from Texas for one night of it.
Randomize
