You finger a girl once and she thinks she loves you. I'm going back to boys. Lesbians are needy.
how much land on farmville do you have now? i sold all my shit to make room i need more money... these animals need to know I'm running a business not a charity.
it's like your virginity...sometimes you have to pretend like it's still there
is it bad i banged a 25yr kindergarten teacher last night?
No thats like a top 10
her moans were so awkward that i kept asking "what" when she'd say my name...
peeing off your aunts pourch into the koy pond seemed like a good idea at the time
after that, he'll be sure to remember me. i'll probably forget him, but that's the way it should be.
I mean, yeah, she was cheating on me but I've been fucking her brother. My secret relationship trumps her secret relationship.
You took it upon yourself to rid the world of them, and by that I mean you dressed up as Batman and started kicking them in the shins.
I'm waiting at the bar and am surrounded by unattractive women.
You need to get here and rebalance this disturbance in the force.
Whatever, I used my iphone to send an Escalade to pick up a booty call last week. For free. It is futuristic as fuck out here.
We play beat the clock every morning. When the alarm goes off, she hits snooze and drops her panties. If I can't finish in time to beat the snooze, she jumps in the shower and I've gotta jerk off.
I do remember telling her that I was about to pass out soon and then hiding my pants under my bed so she couldn't take my wallet even drunk I'm thinking ahead
I just jacked off to nostalgia.
he walked off and puked in the sand. then he made a sand castle over it so that "it wouldn't upset the kids"
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