i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
sorry i walked in and ruined it, but i had to laugh she looked like a pile of bologna the way you had her pinned up on the wall
I find out next week of the Australian was lying about his vasectomy or not. Keep your fingers crossed!
I'm sorry but that single bed couldn't hold all five of us, especially with those boobs.
it's gotten to the point where there are no existing good choices. even our good choices are bad choice by anyone's standards but ours.
is year to celebrate how much I love you, I made a mosaic of your penis with conversation hearts. it's in your mailbox.\n\nHAPPY VALENTINE'S DAY TO YOU
I'm totally wasted about to ride water slides. That's goddamn 'Merican. That and Clint Eastwood.
captain cockblock got me again last night so i put a squirrel in his room and jamed the door shut
i just had diarrhea that people from the 1930's would have died from
Only thing exciting about him was his dick.
His boxer smelled like clean laundry while I was giving him head. It was delightful, like sucking a dick in a spring meadow.
I tied him up for his boyfriend so he could get fisted... I'm the best roommate ever.
Wow. That's certainly more than I've ever done for a roommate.
It's slightly odd going to a booty call during morning rush hour with everyone else going to work.
Im so sorry for peeing on your chest.
Reminder to self: never have sex on a trampoline. Trampoline burn hurts worse than carpet burn.
Randomize
