the liability waiver did not state that i couldn't bring my bottle of wine in the bouncy castle. it did Not.
if you think for one second that i'm not using my mittens as hand puppets at the bar tonight then u dont know me at all!
Apparently getting drunk, buying a guitar from your local costco and walking in to an open mic night is not the same as rocking out to guitar hero...
she won't take no for an answer... no matter what language i said it in
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
First day of class and I'm in a bar drinking pitcher #3. Foreshadowing?
Just found out drinking 6 trays of random shots makes me wake up on a club toilet with my underwear and jeans around my ankles
It's that thing where you don't have any food so you just drink beer to get your needed calories for the day.
The usual, im laying out. Ipod on shuffle, Large spray bottle to cool myself of and a smaller one filled with chilled vodka. I can spray the vodka right in my mouth without even opening my eyes. THIS IS LIVING....
Boob shaped ice luge is ordered for my bday. Boom
I can't even drink.
The liquor comes out the nipples. Out. The. Nipples.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Im not coming back to that place until im drunk. If I walk in there sober Ill start screaming uncontrollably. Not words, just sounds.
Laying in bed nude eating a Big Mac with a cat. It's gonna be a good year.
Well five day drinking adventure in appreciation of cinco de drinko under the belt, great way to start may
Do you understand how hard it is to go down on a guy underwater? Didn't think so....
Life lesson: if a hot naked girl tells you to spit on something, you spit on it. No questions.
The last I heard from her she said she was going to plant sunflowers, get drunk on white wine and listen to Everybody Wants to Rule the World on repeat.
Randomize