Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
are u sure the monkey wasnt drunk too
it was like fucking the hulk in a smartcar
The lack of pants and amount of productivity in my life right now is amazing.
Its 6 am and me and the girl in the next apartment have been taking turns puking and yelling "never agaaaain" thru the walls.
I tried to take a photo for proof but couldn't hold my penis, camera, and measuring tape all at the same time.
my goal was to make out with as many people dressed as batman as possible. I have my priorities.
too late I already started a fight with someone named luscious
Well I was thinking of taking him out for drinks then lecturing him about his drinking... kind of like an open minded intervention
Shia LaBeouf arrested in austin for public intoxication. JUST DO IT
Free stuff before I even put his balls in my mouth like wow great start
Sorry your girlfriend got you a valentines present and you forgot to get her one.
How long will your dick be dry?
On another note, I almost lost one side of my fake butt. Dancing the wobble with the fake butt isn't recommend.
Truth be told it's significantly easier to get over someone when they file a police report on you
Wanna guess where my charger was last night.....in my cooler with my beer. I put it in there because I knew I would never forget my beer.
Randomize
