your dick doesn't do me any good in arizona
I didn't cheat on him. Cheating means finding out. I made sure he was at work first. After the guy left I got shitfaced just so nothing seemed out of the ordinary when he came home.
i blame lastnights decisions on friday the 13th
the pizza man had no reaction when jackie and me opened the door naked, i guess he's used to that shit
of course. lets lasso hookers.
so he came over for the first time and i completely forgot i had pictures of him printed out from facebook on my wall and a newspaper article with him in it.. you can guess that it lead for an awkward situation.
It's been over a month and I still can't find the bra I wore out on new years eve.
I just peed on my pajamas. Its gonna be a long night. Don't forget the cookies.
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
He made me a "booty call of the year" award.
Just hooked up with the fireman who put out the quesadilla fiasco last tuesday.
I have stripper ass cheeks all over my glasses
Teflon bitches. Nothing fucking sticks to this kid, not even a kid. Maury Povitched this shit outta that situation.
I like dinosaurs. I like penises. It's kind of a win win
you said you were the change fairy and you kept throwing all of your quarters at me.
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