with your own penis?
planned parenthood is perfect for picking up chicks...they all put out
I swear after i took it all i did was scream for four hours
theyll ask where you are and ill say on a date crying in a sombrero
like that time i did too much ghb at gay pride
He insisted on us having sex while watching the biggest loser and asked me if I could "resist the temptation".
Still had my bottle opener ring on. Started to give him a hand job. LOL
yo your bro wants to know what time he got home and were you hosing him off
You are number one in my heart. But in the dick Olympics you're disqualified.
She told me about it right after. She said she was scared I would be disappointed. And I was, but I pretended not to be. Which pretty much sums up our relationship.
Please collect your boy friend. He semi-passed out on the couch and trying to grab bums as people walk by. Anyone's bum, he's not choosy.
Don't know how your birthday has been, but mine has involved Hershey's syrup and a blowie. It's safe to say you're playing catch up.
Good, I don't think Coke dipped ring pops hold up in the mail anyway.
So the next time I search for "Dragon Dildo" on my phone, I should probably clear the browser before handing my phone to someone and that's the first thing they see haha
who knew being a fake dominatrix could be so fun?
Dude my cat is eating sugar cookies with me. No joke. My cat likes cookies.
Randomize
