She came to work with 6 additional layers of make-up, playing every Nickelback song about explicit teen sex, and with a dozen twinkies she bet she could finish without chewing any. I'm investing in a rape whistle.
The duggars are the reason premarital sex is ok. Because if you don't have it until marriage you have no self control when it happens. And 19 kids.
you were trying to give my penis an indian burn.
I'm beginning to feel kind of at home at Police stations
I can't cum and do my makeup at the same time.
Weird question, would you want to do fetish porn? you get paid.
Given my current decline of critical thinking and capacity for speech it's probably best u call the cops
I miss the good ol' days when we would yell at strangers from your balcony while wearing our mexican ponchos in the middle of the day.
what ever happened to our old dealer?
She passed out in his mom's bed and when we went to go get her she went 'no its cool I live here'.
Stalker pic that shit
He left, I think he got uncomfortable when I started singing 'oompah oompah doodley do, I have a special riddle for you'
She gave you a handy in the bar and you were surprised she was good with a dick?
Hahah good point
this is the last time i am going to a 7am booty call
If I send you a picture of a dick will you give me your honest reaction?
I'm like a bad decision making factory. I need to sit down and have a chat with my decision making elves.
He’s like Batman if Batman went down on me and gave me multiple toe curling orgasms. He left without saying a word before I pulled the pillow off my face
Find out if he’s shared his techniques with a friend and set me up with him. You know I’ve always had a thing for Robin!!!!
Randomize
