I was so drunk last night, I had to Wikipedia what i did.
apparently it's okay for him to stick his dick in my mouth but not to let me have a can of diet pepsi for the road.
His idea of a romantic evening was shotgunning Keystones. What a keeper.
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
He yelled "HERE COMES THE WARMTH" before he pissed his pants. In front of the whole party.
I think he just gave me the 'I used to sleep with your sister' discount
his grandma walked in on us. twice. and he was truly fucking surprised when i put my pants back on.
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
Party Liz is going to have to have her wings clipped until someone gets me some baby reins to wear
I just peed on a rich man's lawn fuck yeah America
Apparently he got pepper spray on his dick. So he's a literal fire crotch.
I'm potentially being cockblocked by Old Man Winter. What the fuck did I do to piss off an entire season?
Stop leaving buckets of wine at my house.
our moms work together...I can just see the conversation now, hey your daughter ruined my sons marriage, that's probably how it will start.
Sorry I didn't have my phone all night. Did we hang last night?
You bit me
Oh lord I need to hear this story
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