Cab driver just said he likes mutual masturbation in the cab. Um
you threw up in thedumpster behind red robin
and kept yelling "DIRTY BIRD"
I don't remember her name, but I do remember yelling at her from the balcony of the hotel room during her walk of shame.
In a cab. Towels everywhere. Confused.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im so excited to get permanently banned for life from all the old bars again, it is gonna be christmas after all
See, it wasn't that I broke my nose having sex. Its that I forgot about the bedposts...
I'll be in my room with a breakfast burrito at 2:30. It's up to you...
Do you still speak french? one of two girls I woke up with only speaks french...
haha all our friends are at the carnival and I'm on stage dry humping a 40 year old
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
But I don't wanna live with them bc I need to be able to walk around naked and sex on any surface guilt free.
BTW, Julia referred to you as a power bottom. Are you available?
My friends got engaged today and I learned the techniques of going upside down on a stripper pole. I'm not really sure who won...
Never again will I go to my mom's side of the family's parties. After the bride and groom cut the head off the roasted pig together they boarded their RV and rode off into the sunset.
Next time I say "i forgot to eat dinner, oh well" before drinking STRAP ME TO A CHAIR AND FORCE FEED ME BEFORE ALLOWING ME TO CONSUME BOOZE
They stopped fighting to partake in M&Ms and porn.
Randomize