The party tonight has no theme but I decided to go as a home wrecker.
She's the rare girl who loses weight and gets uglier.
win or lose for butler, i'm still masturbating to brad stevens tonight
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
You were hanging upside down on the subway with your feet in the stirrup handle bars. the children were amused.
I tried to tell him I love him but it came out something like "We're both fucked up and it works."
No idea how he made them, but vodka water balloons were a horrible idea.
There are a bunch of highly educated, advanced in their field, PUSSY ASS BITCHES in this bar
Hungover in church. I can feel stained glass Jesus judging me.
I want to just live in between your butt cheeks.
He said that he doesn't like skittles. This relationship is over an it hasn't even started yet.
Question for you. Do you want to go out somewhere or do you want to have sloppy joes at my house? That's not a euphemism for anything; I actually have stuff to make sloppy joes
He said I taste like cake. Like funfetti. So I feel like if he doesn't come back for that he's just dumb
B. I found a note on my phone and all it says is 'Fuck yeah im a racecar'
She is still drunk from the night before, sitting here eating KFC mashed potatoes and drinking Arbor Mist before Anatomy lab.
Randomize
